Renegotiating My Relationship with Education
The season of change is upon us. Leaves are changing. The weather is changing. The time is changing. This time of the year can also be a season of change for educators. The fall season is an optimal time to (re)negotiate your relationship with education. Renegotiating your relationship means actively placing your current life, hopes, and dreams at the center of the work you do. After 26 years in education, I am in a season of change. For the first time in my life, being an educator and contributing to formal education is not a top priority. I have stopped saying yes to opportunities for which colleagues think “you would really make a difference!” I no longer see myself as the solution to education’s myriad problems.
To be clear, I am thankful for the difference becoming an educator has made in my life. As a person who grew up in poverty, my first full-time teaching job completely changed my life. The year prior to getting that first teaching job I had to work three part-time jobs to make ends meet. I would wake up at 3 am to load boxes onto USPS planes at the airport. After three hours of lifting boxes, I trudged home to get my youngest brother ready for school. I then went to classes myself. After classes, I worked as an afterschool assistant. Once I had brought my brother home and made sure he had a snack, I rushed off to Olive Garden to waitress the dinner shift. Becoming an educator allowed me to provide for my two younger brothers, work just one job, and eliminate food and housing insecurity.
Grateful for the financial stability, for the next 10 years I volunteered whenever there was a need at the school. From coaching flag football to leading the yearbook club, to writing curriculum. If there was a need, I strove to meet it. In 2006, burnt out and experiencing two major life events, I attempted to find a new way to contribute to education. I went to graduate school and became a teacher educator. From 2009 until 2018, I gave my all to teacher leaders. Again, led by a deep sense of gratitude I went above and beyond. Answering calls and emails at all hours of the day and over the weekends, traveling far and wide to share my learning, spending hours planning courses. In 2018, I could feel the weight of 22 years in the profession. I knew it was time to welcome the transition I desired. Yet, my depth of gratitude for the financial stability provided over the same 22 years has become a barrier to moving fully forward in my season of change.
Like many educators of color who have benefitted from entering the profession, I struggle with the false belief that I owe education all of my time, gifts, and talents. The last three years have been a teeter-totter of emotions. Yet, in the last three months I have been courageous. I started actively communicating and living my new priorities. This shift has resulted in transparent conversations with my supervisor — including an offer to resign — and tough conversations with colleagues who have always seen me as a solution to the re-occurring problems in education.
Being the solution has always been a driving force in my career. To fully engage my current season, I had to redefine what I considered worthy work. In this season, being an educator is not that work. My new priority is helping adults with a bachelor’s degree or higher improve their writing. This is a known gap in traditional education. Schools simply don’t teach writing. As a result, according to national research, 40% of adults earn a college degree without gaining proficiency in writing. Helping adults increase their writing competency is worthy work. My new priority is just one of many ways to contribute for educators seeking to renegotiate their relationship to education. One could start their own educational organization like STEM to the Future or create a non-profit that supports adult learning such as Digital Promise. There are unlimited options for contributing to education — especially if one believes that knowledge is constructed in all areas and stages of life. Yet the guilt of leaving a profession that is highlighted daily in the media for its desperate needs of educators — and more importantly educators of color — can be overwhelming. When the guilt emerges, I recall the talent, time, and emotional labor I have given education. In honoring all that I have already contributed, I imagine the iconic “paid in full” stamp on payment statements.
In recognizing that I do not owe a debt to education, I have also had to renegotiate my monetary sense of value. After 26 years in the profession, it is no longer enough to be thankful to be holding on to the ledge of financial security (rather than treading water or even worse drowning in debt). Even with a doctorate I make less than $75,000 a year. I don’t say this to minimize the salary as I know many families make much less. In this season of being courageous, the financial reward from being an educator is simply not enough.
Since 2012, I have longed to purchase an apartment complex to house siblings raising siblings. Yet on my current salary, this simply is not possible. To meet my goal, I would need a second and possibly a third job. However, I recently discovered that I could leverage my time, gifts, and talents by teaching writing to adults and easily double my salary to $150,000 a year without increasing the number of hours I work. The salary increase would allow me to purchase an eight-unit apartment complex in 2.5 years. Intellectually this shift seems like a no-brainer. Nevertheless, it has been hard to quiet my inner sense of guilt and the voices of friends and colleagues who see teaching — especially at the university level — as an honorable profession. I don’t necessarily disagree. While being an educator is no longer my top priority, I am not cynical towards those for whom it is. In fact, I find comfort in knowing there are wonderful, justice-oriented folks ready, willing, and interested in addressing education’s myriad challenges.
In this new season, I want to do work that aligns to my new priorities.
Work worth renegotiating my relationship with education.
Dr. Lanette Jimerson is a writer, educator, and scholar. She helps equity-minded leaders expand their impact and craft a career trajectory that centers their professional and financial needs. Book a conversation to learn how she supports leaders in transition. Check out 12 Tips to Transitioning Careers to get started on your journey.
